Thursday, August 25, 2011

Waiting?

I sit here in a ponderous mood, waiting for my just consumed soup and tea to settle and enabling a slightly less waddly gait (too many liquids seems to make me walk like a penguin) I think about the fact that I havn't been blogging for a while. I have found myself in wallowy sort of moods and thinking, "I will wait to blog, I'll wait until something happens" but I have not yet figured out what that something would be so I will share my ponderings with you in the mean time. 
I have been waiting for the "right time" to blog but I am sure if I look there are many other things I have been waiting for the right time to do, write a novel, plant some lettuce? I find that sometimes there are extremely good reasons for waiting for the righ time, such as the fact the chickens escape and eat everything green at the moment so planting lettuce might not be a good idea, I might not have a novel bursting forth right now but surely abandoning writing altogether until I have a fully formed novel ready to type out is a silly idea...and besides, I can raise the lettuce in a styrofoam box which I can bring inside if the chickens are out...
I suspect that a lot of my waiting is a fear of failure, a fear of rejection and that chatty little devil inside that wants me to believe that it isn't worth me trying things. Sometimes I control it sometimes the other way around but one thing is clear to me, there is far to much pointlesss waiting going on in the world in general.
What are you waiting to do? What dream or chore has been hovering around being perpetually put off whilst you await the alignment of the stars or the right phase of the moon or for your children to grow up? What is it that's really stopping you and what are you going to do to overcome it?
Well my soup has settled now so I will leave you with your self examination and next time post about my vintage enameled pots and wooden boxes I have repurposed as planters!

2 comments:

  1. So many things. Writing especially... it's just never good enough. I've also become overly aware of my writing style, even in replies to posts. I use words like but, however etc far too much. I never feel like I have anything interesting enough to post about on my blog. Like you said, the little devil who sits on our shoulders has a lot to answer for.

    It's really easy to make excuses at the moment too, what with our current circumstances being as they are. OH works 60 hours most weeks, 2 kids (who to be fair are pretty good at entertaining themselves now they're older) and one baby, plus dog. Once I've done the things that need doing, all I want to do is veg.

    However, I am starting to include extra things to my to do lists, slowly. At the moment I'm trying to include painting models, as I've found I've got about 220 that need finishing off so they're good enough to sell on. I just need to include some other stuff on the lists too I reckon.

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  2. Your lists are very inspirational- I think you are one who does the least waiting- I really admire the fact that you manage to do so much and with such variety!

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